Making decisions



Maybe you wondered what my big decision was.  (or maybe you didn't)

Well…  it probably isn’t as big of a decision as you might think.  I have purchased a ticket to go to Haiti in December.  A lot has changed in my life since I purchased that ticket.  And so I am trying to decide if that is where God wants me in December. I love Haiti and of course I would like to go, but Haiti is not a place I just vacation, so it takes much thought, much prayer, and much planning.  

People say “well you said you were going to go, shouldn’t you go?”

The answer is:  Maybe.

Well, really the answer is yes or no.

I’ve told a couple people and they only thing they have asked is “well what does God say?”

I can remember a time in my life when I would have asked EVERYONE’s opinion.  And then I’d weigh it.  it really sucked to be like that.  It’s much too much, thinking I might disappoint someone and quite frankly that is just too much for someone like me who is a people pleaser.  Much too much.  

Talk about a fruit stealer.  I stole my own fruit.  No one did that to me. I did it to myself.  

I hate that about me, or who I was. 

I am not sure what God has in store, I know that He seems to be shuffling the deck of my life, lately.   
And I can tell you as a self proclaimed busy person and change hater, I have found myself in the quietness of Him.  I have found myself embracing the change and feel like people think I am going to have a hard time, but I’m trusting in the One who loves me.  I find myself cleaning out, and letting go, finding the clutter, the things that matter most to me. I find as I discovering the things that God has created in me, and the things that it is time for me to let go of, things I have been holding on to for far too long.

I love the fact that God has refined me many times, and in the times of refining, I grow a little more each time. I find myself a little stronger, a little more joyful, and little more…  me.  Who God created me to be.

I love my new Fruit of the Spirit study, I am growing deeper in love with God, who He says He is, who He says I am.  I still don’t know if I am going to Haiti in December.  But I know that I will have confidence in whatever direction God has me going. 

He is with me.

Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it."  Isaiah 30:21

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